It's been an interesting summer so far. Not necessarily good or bad, just interesting.

I've had so many emotions this summer. Sometimes I've been on a super high & other times I am riding on that low. I've met some new people & other I've distanced away from. Sometimes I have a whole realm of free time, others I can barely get a minute to myself. Many a times I've cried & many a times I've rejoiced. Just when I think God doesn't have me in mind, He surprises me.

Everytime I go to bed, I pray for the unexpected. I don't like the predictable, whether it's a predictable situation, a predictable boy, or even a predictable game in the World Cup. That's probably why I make other people make certain decisions for me, because I want to be surprised. Sometimes I just get in my car with no direction or purpose & just drive & sometimes it's surprising where I end up at the end of the road.

As I head to Nicaragua just for my annual fix of mission work, I know God will reveal just some more of the unpredictable to me. Nicaragua always lets me clear my head & lets me really listen to what God is telling me. As I pray for this summer, I will continue to pray for the unexpected. However, the unexpected doesn't cut short of the summer. Besides, if everything was predictable where would the faith be?

There is such thing as a Hell...it's called College School Work.

So, I was excited to go home this weekend because 1. I haven't been home in a bazillion years I felt like, 2. I missed my dogs (yes, that is a good excuse), 3. Plenty of laundry to do (the laundry machines are school are too inconsistent), & 4. I was gonna be going on a pretty awesome date. However, I realized while packing my overexcessive amount of clothes that I don't need in one weekend that in two weeks I'll be on my extremely early spring break. However, the biggest concern wasn't what I was gonna do for spring break, but how I was gonna make it through alive these next two weeks with all my school work. 

Looking at my planner, I've never seen so many assignments, tests, papers, worthless homework things highlighted before in my entire life. It was already as if the last week of April was already here & the end of school was around the corner, but this was TWO WEEKS BEFORE SPRING BREAK. oh dear...

I went to bed last night with a lot on my mind & with all this school work I kinda started getting a little stressed. I woke up this morning whining about it raining & how I didn't want to go to my Greek class (its my only one on Monday at eleven, I know...pathetic). I think I groaned throughout class & groaned through lunch looking ahead to the week of spring break & not even wanting to be concerned about my work. I finally got my quiet time & I read Psalm 37:24 which says, "Though he falls, he will not be overwhelmed, because the Lord holds his hand."

Thank goodness God perseveres when I cannot. I'm a naturally strong-willed person but it is because of my faith I can be strong-willed. God will press on with me this week & the next & for the rest of my life which is the awesomest most amazing thing ever. God believes I can get through it although I whine & moan, He's the reason I can get out of bed when I don't wanna go to class, He's the reason I can get through all these assignments, He's the reason I can persevere in all things. 

So nonetheless, I'm looking SOOO forward to spring break. Getting there will be a complete back buster but thank goodness God is busting his back along with me.

God is good. 

After flipping through the Book of Matthew for New Testament, reading 169 pages of the worst version of Sleeping Beauty, watching an unsuccessful Super Bowl (thank you very much Colts...), & only reading 10 pages out of 60 for psychology I've decided to blog. 

This week was hard as far as my spiritual life goes. I found myself concentrating more on school work & praying less & not even going to the gym where I usually pray while I run my usual 30 minutes on the treadmill. Of course through all these mounds & mounds of school work I always ask myself: WHY? As a follower of Christ, I would rather be a missionary & live in a third world country for the rest of my life & work for the Lord, let it be manual labor or evangelism? What's the point of writing papers on arguments that test the existence of God or what's the point of learning about the 5000 versions of Beauty & the Beast in my fairy tale English class? 

Whether I realize it or not, God truly put me in college because I've learned some of life's & God's greatest messages just by living in a cramped dorm room & eating less than perfect dining hall food. I know in the day & age we are told to go get an education, to make ourselves successful with a Bachelor's degree, Master's degree, & even a Doctorate degree. However the last thing I ever thought when I went to college was feeding my spiritual needs, I honestly thought I would change for the worst & that my faith will be sufficient in time. 

I know realize after already spending a semester & a month into college that that's why I'm in college. Jeremiah 29:11 says, " 'For I know the plans I have for you'- this is the Lord's declaration- 'plans for your welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future & a hope.' "

Although I'd rather be working in a foreign country glorifying God, I know I'm here at Presbyterian College to glorify God & to grow in the faith before God puts me in my place after college. God has my future in hand & I have to put my full faith in Christ while working on these seemingly worthless assignments in college. I have all hope in what God is going to do & I know it'll be worth all the while.

Gimme Some Time...

Lately I've been feeling the stress of not having enough time...time to sleep, time to get all this enormous amount of school work done, time to pray & spend time with God, time to work out, time to do this, time do that...basically, it's not enough time. I stress waaaayyy too much sometime & my optimism quickly runs out over a period of time. I find myself grabbing more & more ice cream at dinner time, it seems to be the only thing I can control lately. ha.

Despite my lack of time, God knows my worry & stress every second of every minute of every day. He loves me despite my lack of prayer & meditation with him & He gives me this crazy time so I can appreciate the quiet, less chaotic times with Him. It is at the end of week when I can look back & learn from lack of discipline in Christ that time in the Lord is precious & I should value my time in any way I can. 

So despite my lack of sleep, lack of physical fitness, lack of whatever it is, God gives us all the time in the world to reach to Him in these times. Maybe not having enough time isn't so bad after all.

Haven't Been Here in Awhile.

Well as i sit here in the library with nothing to do i anxiously waiting for B. Don to ask me a question about our english paper which is due tomorrow, although i've already finished it days (haha...lame, i know).

i haven't been on this blog in awhile. I kinda miss it actually. College has been one overwhelming experience already, I can't even imagine being almost done with my first semester of college. It flew by before I could even catch it. I had the usual freshman meltdown in the beginning of the semester, but as time goes on God puts us in our place. I asked myself day & night, "Why am I at PC?" & part of the answer comes from how much my faith has grown in the Lord. My faith has never been stronger & it makes me anxious to get home & share with everyone what God has been doing in my life. 

I've been strained, distressed, disappointed, shot down, stepped down, & so much more here in college & yet there was one moment when I finally felt God snap me in half & said, "Give up McKenzie. Give it all to me, let me help you." & help me he certainly did. I don't ever go a day without spending time in the Word & I'm always finding myself talking to God. It's a pretty exciting feeling. 

As I go home for my super extended Thanksgiving break I look forward to seeing alot of my friends & just sit down & talk. We all know I love talking & I love listening. I believe any story can connect people together, doesnt matter whether we relate or not. 

Well...coming from the PC library, good night & sweet dreams.

Oh the month of February.

So for the past couple of years the month of February has been the longest month, even though it contains 3 days less than almost all the other months. But for the past 4 days, I can feel February coming & going right before my eyes. Even through the rantings of my math teacher & the soccer practices that never seem to end, February is catching March as we know it. After March will come April & after April will come May &....we graduate. Its crazy to think that for one moment we were in kindergarten & learning the alphabet & the next moment we are filling out college applications & wondering where our new home will be next fall....whoa.
Senioritis hit most of the seniors when they were a freshmen & it hits them even harder now as May approaches.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is I hope this last February in high school goes a little slower than all the other years before.
Enjoy it.

Here I Am.

Wow. My mother recently told me I should start blogging because when I head off to college & I'm going to want to say alot. So here I am to share with you my deep thoughts I guess you could call them. I hope you find this as a benefit as much as I find it.